It happens to all of us… We are inspired to grow, change and create new things. Then the voices of doubt start to creep in. It happens to me almost every time I launch a new course, create a new meditation, write a new song, send an email like this one. There’s a point where I’m excited and I go for it, then suddenly I’m not sure it’s good enough.
So, here are 7 things I like to remind myself of when doubt creeps in and I feel like a fraud…
1. TRUST YOURSELF
Most of us were taught to betray our instincts as small children in order to please the adults in our lives. This causes a lot of pain, doubt and mistrust within ourselves down the road.
When you trust your inner voice and follow your inner guidance, you can lead your life from a place of peace, joy and centeredness.
Betraying yourself to please others, or be who you think they want you to be, will only cause you to feel more doubt. When you are on your own side, you cannot go astray.
2. DO WHAT YOU WANT
Lucille Ball once said, “I cured myself of shyness when it finally occurred to me that people didn’t think about me half as much as I gave them credit for. The truth was, nobody gave a damn… When I stopped being a prisoner to what I worried was others’ opinion of me, I became confident and free.”
Other people aren’t thinking about you half as much as you think they are. On top of that, it’s none of your business what others think of you. It only matter’s what you think of you.
So, do what you want. Everyone else is too busy worrying about themselves to give a damn about what you’re up to.
3. OWN YOUR STORY
Write down all the things you have done in your life that have led you to now…
All the jobs you’ve had… courses you’ve taken… relationships you’ve been in… roles you’ve played… stuff you’ve created… places you’ve been… sights you’ve seen… love you’ve given… pain you’ve come through… all the Everything’s you’ve experienced and done in your life to this point.
Write down anything and everything that comes to mind.
You’ll be amazed how many lifetimes you’ve lived in your 20, 40, 60+ years. Your life experiences have taught you everything you know.
That makes you an expert on yourself, your life and your experiences. Own it!
4. FOLLOW YOUR JOY
You don’t need to have everything figured out. You don’t need to have all the answers. You don’t need to know what’s next.
All you ever need to do is ask, “What would bring me joy right now?” Then do that thing.
Curiosity and comparison cannot co-exist. Choose curiosity and there’s no room to feel like a fraud.
Take it from Katharine Hepburn: “If you do what always pleases you, at least one person is happy.”
Having trouble accessing your Joy? Try this meditation.
5. MANTRAS & AFFIRMATIONS
Here are a few affirmations you can use as a personal mantra when impostor syndrome starts to take over:
“I am joyful and engaged.”
“I am curious and open.”
“I am ready and open to give. I am ready and open to receive.”
“I am enough, just as I am. Always have been. Always will be.”
“What’s truly meant for me is unstoppable. It needs me, and I need it.”
“I trust my instincts and inspirations.”
6. BE WHERE YOU ARE
The past doesn’t exist except as a memory in the present moment. The future doesn’t exist except as a thought or projection happening in the present moment.
When you compare yourself to others, worry about the future or ruminate on the past, you are not able to respond to what’s actually happening in the present moment.
If you are interested in learning more about being who you are, where you are through meditation. I highly recommend this free meditation app. You can start by listening to this, this and this meditation from my Stay with Yourself Meditation Series. Yay!
7. FAKE IT ‘TIL YOU MAKE IT
Part of the work of rerouting your neurological pathways is doing things that are foreign to you or outside your comfort zone. Sometimes you need to “act as if” on the outside as a way to influence and guide how you feel on the inside.
It’s not about being phony or dishonest. It’s about choosing your thoughts and actions.
If everything inside you is screaming that you’re not good enough, it’s time to take mindful action and live from what you know to be true: You are good enough. You always have been and always will be.
If you act like it on the outside and make choices that are in alignment with Truth, not fear, eventually you’ll start to feel good enough on the inside too.
Wherever you are today, whatever you are doing, I hope you know how amazing you are!